Boysenberry Togetherness

I made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich having gotten back from the "club" at a little after 1:00 a.m. this morning. The reggae band was pretty awesome, and the grooviness of the music made me want to close my eyes and pretend I was in Jamaica rather than downtown Newport Beach.
So as I was spreading the jelly on the bread, I was reminded that he liked boysenberry jam-just like me; it was both our favorites. It was little things like this that make me think of the time when I was happiest. It was crazy like that, the way we liked the same random things. we had so much in common, him and I.
But the other day he called me and reminded me that he now is "in a different place in his life" as if justifying why he would find the need to be with "new girl" rather than me.
We had so much to talk about, we'd talk for hours. I didn't think it was possible that a person (especially a guy) would have so much to say. He liked boysenberry syrup and loved breakfast as much as I do. He liked my artistic talents and I loved his ninjitsu training skills; he always promised to teach me-but I was a poor student.
He made me tea just the way I liked it, and would make me dinner "just because."
But he's with someone else now, and I am not as bitter about it as I thought I'd be. I have finally accepted it and am ready to move on. Perhaps the next guy will like all of the things that he didn't. Perhaps my new guy will want to cuddle with me, want to take vacations and explore the world, will want to really live.
I realized that the boysenberry is really a combination of three berries-the raspberry, loganberry, and blackberry. They took three very good berries and combined them to make what I consider to be the best berry. And I guess that's what it is that makes a good relationship.
Instead of looking at my past as yet another time of broken hearts and dreams, I think that J is like one of the berries-one of the experiences I needed in my life to combine together to make me who I am. And me, the new and improved Sarah who has learned from her mistakes, will go forward and take what she's learned-the good and the bad-and will use it to better her next relationship.
Old relationships are merely the fruits of labor that combine to make you into the wonderful person that you are. Instead of hurting you, they help to form you and make you stronger, better.
There was once a time when I regretted meeting J, but now I am glad because it taught me to be a better person, and to look for better people than myself. It's important to look for people who lift you up, challenge you, and make you into a better person. After all, you owe it to yourself to be the best berry you can be, right?